We want our children to listen to us, but we also want them to feel confident that they have good ideas to share and we care what they think.
Finding this balance can be tricky- especially with a strong willed child- I am not *against* saying no, but I am *for* saving it for special needed times.
A good way to try to work on balancing this concept is exploring your child’s idea and reasons behind it.
For example-
Instead of this:
child: I want to go to disneyland
parent: no, we can’t it is closed
child: I want to go to disneyland still
parent: No, it is closed you never listen
child: *throws body on ground crying and becomes licking your eyeball furious*
- Do this-
child: I want to go to disneyland
parent: oh?! what would you do if we went to disneyland?
child: I really want to see Elsa
parent: oh what would you say to else when you see her?
child: that olaf is so silly!
parent: wow I bet she would really love to hear that from you one day when we can go again? what is so silly that olaf did that you remember?
No “nos” no problem!
more self-esteem built!
more connection
less defiance
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